My office has been working remotely since the last week. It’s a novel situation. Going into it, I had wondered how we would all cope. Strangely, I have realized over the course of the week, that I have never been as productive and efficient at work. Work is something I cling to, in the hope that some things haven’t changed. It’s almost a desperate desire to make myself believe that life can go on as normal. That life is normal. That a minute virus cannot play such havoc in our lives. Despite every evidence to the contrary.
We live in interesting times. It’s I believe, a Chinese curse. There are so many things I had taken for granted. Hopping into a cab to go to work, a quick hug to a colleague who had just returned from a trip, sharing food at lunch, the easy banter, those quick meetings outside the office. Who would have thought that going into a cinema or eating out, which we did almost on auto-pilot, would become the very things that threaten us today? I view with suspicion the passer-by who just coughed. Was it a dry cough, I have caught myself thinking, fearfully.
The routine of the days, which I had sometimes chafed at, is today the very thing I crave for. I crave the daily human contact, those stimulating conversations, and the sheer ordinariness of the pre-corona days. I was guilty of skipping my exercise routine on some days, giving in to laziness and inertia. Today, while I circumnavigate my building endlessly, I miss the gym so much, it’s almost a physical ache. The school days, the office days, meeting my friends every day – these were the blessings that I never counted when I had them. The only silver lining is, my family is around me, and unlike so many Indian parents with kids studying abroad, my son is in my safe circle.
I catch myself thinking longingly about our travels and our last big trip which was three months ago. I wish I had stopped and lingered for a while more on that white snow, breathed in more of that crisp air. I wish I had cast one more glance at the vistas we were leaving behind, instead of eagerly thinking about home. When will we travel again, happily and without care? When will we get over the suspicions which have become such a daily part of our psyche in such a short time?
Now it seems ironic that we were watching that show on Netflix about a dystopian world. Our dystopian world is right here, not far into the future, not in 2050. We are living it every day. People with masks, and sanitisers at every entrance to everything, are our realities today. The way we have been forced to isolate or socially distance ourselves is our reality today. Someone said this is our planet’s way of repairing itself, of replenishing its resources. If that’s true, it makes me immensely sad. Did we have to lose so many of our freedoms to realize the privileges we had? If these are interesting times, give me boredom and routine any day. I crave it.